L's illness
by Emerald princess3
Summary: "Come on Ryuzaki, Watari and I are trying, but we need you to help too." Light said gazing at the seemingly lifeless detective lying before him. "This is a waiting game now isn't it Ryuzaki, to see whether you'll get through this or break Watari's heart. Honestly, I don't think he could take that kind of pain." No flames please I don't own death note
1. Chapter 1

Light gazed at the figure on the bed as he carefully placed the cool cloth on Ryuzaki's heated forehead. The detective seemed so lifeless, if not for the gentle rise and fall of his chest as he drew in weak breaths though barely visible, Light would swear he was gone.

"Come on Ryuzaki, you have to help us out. Watari and I are trying but you have to work with us. He's worried about you, and so am I.I don't understand how you went from having a small fever to this in a day and a half but people are counting on you. Watari mostly, if you would have seen the look on his face when you passed out-" Light straightened the blanket around his rival. At the present time, he didn't feel much like a rival, he felt a strange sense of concern for the man, who only seemed to weaken by the hour.

Light leaned back in his chair.

"It's just a waiting game now isn't it Ryuzaki, we wait to see how long it takes for you to pull through or break Watari's heart, between you and me, I don't think he can take that kind of pain." Several minutes passed with little more than the sound of the ticking clock on the wall.

suddenly, a small moan escaped L's lips, Light leaned forward as L struggled to open his eyes.

"Ryuzaki, come on, wake up." Light encouraged. After what seemed like an eternity, L's dark eyes peered into Light's.

"L-Light?" L whispered glanced around but didn't recognize his surroundings.

"How are you feeling?"

"I- I am not sure, I feel many things. Where are we?"

"It's a private medical building. Watari said you'd be safe here. I probably would have moved you somewhere that had regular doctors."

"What exactly do you mean by that?"

"You have myself and Watari to care for you and at the moment, Watari had an errand on the upper floors.

"Why would Watari take me to-" a wave of dizziness distracted him from his thought.

"You don't remember being sick at the taskforce building?" Light asked.

"I...remember certain things." L said before coughing. He winced at the pain it caused him.

"Tell me what you remember and I'll fill in everything else."

"I was feeling... Okay in the morning, then I felt very warm, and I felt as if I would be ill. There were strange lights everywhere and-"

"What lights Ryuzaki?"

"You did not notice them, they were terribly bright. Perhaps it was something to do with the monitors, the channels being changed." Light pulled the chair closer to L's bed.

"Ryuzaki, you weren't near the monitors. You spent most of the afternoon, which is when you started to really show symptoms, lying on the cot Watari forced you to use. We were all there, nothing around you could have possibly made strange, bright lights. The only time you left that cot was when I helped you to the bathroom and you got sick. When you finished, you collapsed on the floor, I called Watari and you were telling him it hurt. You wouldn't say what it was but then you just passed out."

"Hmm. Strange indeed." L commented closing his eyes again.

"Ryuzaki?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you okay?"

"That I don't know, but I have a feeling our chances of finding out maybe somewhere around fifty percent."

A/N; hello everyone, I hope you enjoyed chapter one of my second Death Note fiction.

Thanks for reading.


	2. Chapter 2

L was drifting, at times he could hear Watari speaking with Light, their voices seemed distorted, he couldn't understand the conversation. He had little time to concern himself with what they were saying,as he could feel himself losing consciousness once more, it felt peaceful, and there was no pain. He wanted to stay in the gentle darkness he had found, but one thing stood in his way.

"Ryuzaki, open your eyes, please" The panicked voice called to him, a tone of extreme urgency. Watari.

"Ryuzaki!' The older man shouted again. L had no choice but to force himself to respond somehow, after everything the man had done for him, if Watari asked, L would do anything he could, his comfort would have to wait. With much difficulty, L forced his eyes open.

"W-Watari" he said in a feeble whisper.

"Ryuzaki, I thought I'd-" Watari was clearly very upset, he was doing his best to keep his voice even but L knew the man well enough to see through the attempt.

L's vision was blurred and he felt his eyes closing of their own accord. Something touched his cheek, it was soft, cool and comforting.

"No. Stay awake just for a little while" Watari instructed

"I am trying Watari" he managed to say, ignoring the returning pain for Watari's sake.

"I know you are. I'm very grateful for that." L shivered despite the blanket covering his thin body.

"You're cold?"

"Most of me feels that way, my head however is-" he gasped at the sharp pain traveling through his body.

"What is it?"

"It's very painful."

"What is, I need you to tell me. "

"E-everything." Light rushed through the door, he sounded to L as if he had run a marathon.

"Found...it." he panted.

"Good. Thank you, now I you to get-"

"You couldn't tell me there was something else you needed while I was there?" Light complained.

"I'm sorry but It's vital to-"

"Watari, give Light a few minutes."

"You need to have-"

"I will survive the next several minutes." L said calmly. Watari didn't seem convinced.

"Alright. I can allow two." Watari said.

"Have you ever tried to catch your breath in such a short time?" L asked.

"This is important, you need to have fluids. The illness will not wait for Light to have a break." Watari was feeling quite anxious now.

"Perhaps not, but we will." Light felt a rush of gratitude toward L.

"Ryuzaki, this illness, whatever it may be, with the rapid decline in your health can be dangerous, we have to start something."

"I will allow you to do that, just be patient and trust me."

"I didn't realize Watari was a doctor" Light said.

"He has sufficient training in many fields." L replied

"If you're able to speak, you're able to breathe, go up to the next floor and bring me the IV supplies." Watari ordered. Without hesitation, Light left the room.

L allowed his eyes to close. He was too weak to fight it.

"Ryuzaki?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you okay?"

"At the present time, I just need to rest, I am very tired." Having said this, the detective knew no more of his surroundings. He would soon be awakened by the insertion of the needle into his hand. Instinctively, L attempted to pull his hand away.

"It's alright Ryuzaki, It's just the IV going in. I need you to be still so I can put it in properly." Without opening his eyes he nodded.

"Don't worry, everything is going to be okay." Light said taking a cool damp cloth and placing it on L's head.

"Light Yagami, do I look as if I am worried to you?"

"If anything you seem a bit out of it."

"Well, that may be true, however I am aware of much of what is happening around me."

"How can you be so calm, we don't know what it is, how to treat it but you're lying there acting like It's all fine." Light just couldn't understand it.

"There is no reason to be upset, what is meant to happen will. Watari, I feel as though I may be sick." The old man quickly leaned the bed up and handed a pink container to L who immediately began to vomit.

Light turned away, the sound of the detective gagging was bad enough. It made Light feel as though he would be joining in. After several minutes the sounds ceased, replaced by the desparate gasps for air and painful moans.

"I apologize" L said finally both hands resting on his stomach which was now aching badly.

"Don't, it happens." Light said trying to ease his own nausea.

"You just take it easy. Would you like me to lower the bed again?" L shook his head.

"I would like to sit up for a while."

"Very well, rest. I will get you something for the nausea and vomiting." Watari promised.

"I would like that very much. Thank you Watari." The older man adjusted the blanket around L.

"Are you warm enough, can I get you anything?" L sighed.

"Another pillow would be nice, I have a little too warm but I suspect that will change when I have recovered from the vomiting." Watari nodded.

"We should run some tests as well. I will do my best to make it as painless as possible. For the moment lie still and rest. I'll get that pillow now." He said. Light watched him leave before walking over to L's bedside.

"He really cares about you doesn't he Ryuzaki, are you two close?"

"The relationship between Watari and myself is irrelevant to you, Kira." Light sighed.

"Really Ryuzaki, you're starting that again, I guess you can't be too sick then. You probably should just focus on getting enough rest though, you can accuse me later."

"I will."

"Yeah,.I know. Tell me then, why would Kira be here beside you, getting you medicine and helping Watari look after you?"

"Covering your tracks. If I die from this, you do realise that you would be suspected anyway don't you?"

"I know that no matter what I do, I'll be suspected. Mr. Percentages."

"You are such a child Light Yagami."

"Said the detective who eats nothing but sweets."

"Stop talking." L demanded.

"This arguing isn't doing you any good. You-"

"Light?" L asked staring into a corner of the room.

"What is it Ryuzaki, are you alright?"

"Do you see that?" Light turned his head but saw nothing.

"There's nothing there."

"Are you positive?" L asked.

"Yes. What-"

"Then you should tell Watari to get back in here, now."


	3. Chapter 3

L watched the lines travel across the monitor, they reminded him of ocean waves, in the way that they would go up and come back down to finish their journey. The semi loud beeping from the machine next to him seemed to drown out the rest of the sounds around him.

He was aware of the figure in the room but simply didn't care, he wanted to sleep, if for nothing else, a release from his illness, if only temporarily. A cool hand pressed to his head forced him back into his surroundings.

"Ryuzaki, you didn't hear a word I said did you?"

"No. I am very sorry Light, I had other thoughts."

"Twenty minutes Ryuzaki, I have been trying to talk to you for twenty long, unproductive minutes."

"Please summarize the conversation, you have my attention.

"Are you sure about that?"

"Yes." L said moving his head away from light.

"The test came back, this one was negative. Watari's going to try-hey, I need you to focus." Light groaned in frustration.

"I think It's time I spoke to Watari about you having free reign with the pain management button. Or at the very least lowering the strength a bit. It's making you act stranger than usual." Light removed his hand continued.

"He wants to do a blood test, so he had to go get some of those tubes and should be back any time now. Those have to be sent to a,lab so it could take some time to-" Light waited for the harsh coughing to end. The detective's breaths were becoming weak.

"Ryuzaki, I'm going to contact Watari, that doesn't sound good at all." Light took out his phone only to have L place a hand on his arm to stop him.

"H-how long has he been away?"

"He left just before I started trying to talk to you. I didn't think it would take this long to-"

"Then let him be. He will return when he has acquired them." L said, though he knew what Watari was truly doing.

"Are you sure about this, we don't even know what's wrong, you get worse constantly, I could have gotten those for him, he should have been here with you, he's the one with medical training."

"It is as it should be." L said.

"I don't understand this part of your logic. I don't know what to do for you if-"

"You are already doing it."

"What?"

"You and I are both very intelligent people. You were to watch me and keep my attention. Watari is also very intelligent however, it is very difficult to care for someone you know personally with such an illness."

"What you're telling me is that Watari needs a break?"

"Yes. But I do believe he has some sort of security measure set to keep watch on us."

"I wouldn't doubt that. I gathered that he cares very deeply for you. Is he -"

"Once again Light Yagami, you have asked too many questions and will recieve the same answer. The relationship between Watari and myself is irrelevant to you. I would hope for Watari's return to be quick if I were you." L said clearly frustrated.

"Why would that effect me?"

"Because I have grown tired of your line of questions, even now it is taking a lot for me not to kick you." Light chuckled.

"In your condition, maybe your fever's worse than we think, you're becoming delusional Ryuzaki."

"Do not provoke me." L warned. His voice was calm but stern.

"You shouldn't waste your strength on something of that nature, you can kick him later when you get back to your full strength." Watari said entering the room he held a medium sized box in his arms.

"How do you feel?"

"Not well." Watari stroked the detective's head comfortingly.

"Thank you Light, I understand that it wasn't easy at first." Watari placed the box down on the table beside the bed.

"I'm going to take some blood, I need you to be still." L nodded and allowed Watari to take hold of his arm. L lay still as Watari worked. It seemed to take a long time for the man to find a vein he could use. When finally one presented itself, the old man readied the needle.

"You're going to feel a cold, wet sensation, that's the swab for sterilizing your skin." Again L nodded. Just as Watari had told him, the cold touched his arm, he shivered.

Light watched curiously, he himself had had blood work done before but didn't react to the alcohol swab in such a way. Watari sighed.

"I'm going to put the needle in now. We're nearly done. I have to ask you not to move." L watched as Watari lowered the needle to his arm and carefully inserted it. Much to L's displeasure, nothing hapoened forcing Watari to move the needle several times.

"Must you do this?" He asked.

"Yes, I'm sorry, if you were able to take liquids, it wouldn't be so difficult. The IV helps but water would be best. I know you have a hard time with it and I am not blaming you for this so don't give me that look Ryuzaki." L didn't reply. He watched as the crimson liquid flowed into the tube.

"You can actually watch that happen?" Light asked. He never liked to see it when his was taken.

"Yes. It is my blood, why should it bother me?" Even as he said this, L began to feel faint.

"Listen to me, I'm going to have to put the band back on. I need you to stay alert."

"What's happening?" Light asked, L couldn't help thinking He deserved an award for his acting look of concern was almost convincing.

"His blood pressure's dropping and I'm having trouble stopping the blood loss." Watari said. L felt a tightening sensation on his arm.

"Ryuzaki!" The shout surprised L as it didn't come from Watari.

'He is a gifted actor, I will give Kira that much, but he is no match for justice in the long run.' L thought slipping once more into darkness.

L had no idea how long he had slept, he could hear a faint voice speaking. He lay still not having the strength to open his eyes

"Come Ryuzaki, that's enough, Watari can only do so much. Stop giving in, you're supposed to be the best, you risk your life all the time, but you won't fight for it for Watari's sake .

'You are right, I have not been giving him much help. What must he think?' L thought.

"How much further will you go this way?"

'Not long. My time is likely to be very Limited. It is very cold in here, hard to breathe' As if someone had read his mind, he felt something being placed over his mouth and nose. L was grateful for the oxygen that now made him relax slightly. It was felt good not having to struggle.

"We're going to figure this out, you'll get better. You have to. Watari called someone to get the samples and we should get the report soon. Just hold on. It's going to be alright.' L felt Light's hand touch his. An attempt at false comfort. Still, L at the moment would take it, uf only for a little while


	4. Chapter 4

"At this point Light, I'm not sure what can be done. If we don't find the cause- he's running out of time, whatever this is, It's too much." Watari was clearly pained by the realization, as he stroked the sleeping detective's head affectionately.

"His tests should come back any day now, It's already been two days since you sent the samples, you can't give up on him."

"I couldn't do that to him. I've never witnessed an illness like this before. Ryuzaki has never been so ill. I was supposed to care for him, protect him."

"You're doing that, he's still alive because of it." Light said comfortingly.

"It's a miracle he's still here. Somehow, he's still holding on for us. He must have some strength in him after all."

"He's Ryuzaki, of course he does."

"I can't imagine what I would do if I lost him." Light couldn't explain the sadness he felt for the old man. This must be a trick of some kind, to make him feel this and expose his weakness.

"Even after seeing all of this, I would take his place in a heart beat. Ryuzaki is not just anyone, he's-"

"He tries to stay professional, but he's been slipping as far as it goes. He allows you to show how much you care, in front of a suspect?"

"He's doing it for me. Not that it's any business of yours."

"If I was Kira, don't you think I'd have most of the information needed?"

"Whether or not you are Kira, will have to wait. For the moment you are light Yagami, nothing more until he is well." Light couldn't help feeling as though the old man was becoming more desparate to have L back.

"I'm sorry Watari, for what you two are going through." Light said quietly, he meant it. There was something about seeing the pair this way that made it difficult to want them dead.

"Light, would you mind sitting with him, I need to get him another IV, he's very close to the end of this one."

"It's no problem, get whatever you need." Light lowered himself into the chair beside L's bed.

"Thank you. If something changes, for the worst, the button on the wall will alert me if pressed." Light nodded.

"Come on Mr. I hate to lose, you're going to let yourself be defeated by this, can you hear us, if so you'd know that Watari's suffering along with you. You don't have to be super intelligent to know it. You have to start fighting, you wanted to kick me the other day Ryuzaki, you can't do it lying here. Get better, for Watari, I know sometimes It's easier to just give in. You can't do that. Watari is doing everything he can for you and it doesn't seem like the effort matters to you."

L moved his head slightly toward the sound for Light's voice.

"You hear me now don't you?" Light pressed a hand to L's forhead.

"This thing just won't quit." He commented. He proceeded to place a compress on L's head.

"Listen Ryuzaki, if you can, I don't want to fight you, and I know we've been having words lately, We need you to fight this, your blood test results should be back soon, we'll know what to give you then. It's going to be alright."

"I-I am doubtful." L whispered without opening his eyes.

"You shouldn't be, Watari's going to bring you more medicine and-"

"I am afraid that as much as Watari is doing for me, there is little chance I will live."

"But there still is one. There's hope." L coughed sharply into his sleeve, moaning softly at the pain.

"I would say that I have a four percent chance of recovering."

"It's better than zero percent, some people don't get your four percent."

"I truly wish that both you and Watari were not forced to witness this. We don't even know If what I have can be passed to either of you."

"Ryuzaki, Watari and I are here by choice. He was going to let me stay in confinement like before, I wanted to be here, if I get it, It's my own fault. I know we've been pretty upset with each other, let's try another approach. If you get well, the next time you feel like kicking me, do it. Just get better first."

"Be careful about the sort of deals you make with me, I might hold you to it."

"Good. I'd hold you to your word too, so I'd expect you to do the same."

"Is Watari... Very upset?"

"Yes. You can't expect him to be happy about this can you?"

"No. I suppose not. He will be devastated when I tell him."

"Then don't. Your chance can increase."

"It is more likely to decrease, I am getting worse." L's heart went out to watari, he could imagine his reaction.

The detective's eyes began to wander around the room.

"Ryuzaki, is it the lights again?"

"They are less bright, moving"

"I'll get Watari, remember to stay awake if you feel tired." He reached for the button only to have L stop him.

"Light, we mustn't call Watari. He won't be long, he has enough on his mind."

"Last time this happened you told me to-"

"I know. It does not matter now. I am not sure what this is, why suddenly they are moving."

"Ryuzaki, how are you feeling?" Watari asked reentering the room. In his arms he carried the IV equipment.

"Will I ever be done with those, they are uncomfortable." L complained.

"As soon as you are well enough to take food and water along with other medications and keep them down you will not longer need this. Please keep still." L frowned but did as he was told.

"Was there anything from the lab today?" Light asked.

"Not yet but there's still time for them to contact me. We have to be patient a little longer. I'm sure it will-" Watari's cellphone interrupted the conversation.

"This is the lab now, I'll take it in the hall. Light, would you mind?"

"No, go ahead."

"We'll find out now Ryuzaki, and you'll see you were wrong."

"Or that I have been correct the entire time and my last days will be worse than I could have imagined." He thought again of Watari, the shattered look on the man's face, the pain in his heart. L sighed heavily.

"Sometimes Light, I truly hope I am wrong."


	5. Chapter 5

"I wonder why It's taking so long, he's been out there for fifteen minutes or so"

"If I had to guess, Watari has received some answers that he is not particularly fond of." L replied.

"Ryuzaki, you don't think they -"

"Yes. I regret that he found out this way. It would have been better if I told him myself."

"What part of losing someone you love can be softened because they tell you instead of the news coming from a medical doctor?"

"Sometimes it is better to receive painful information from a loved on as opposed to a medical professional because the loved one will often be more sympathetic. Doctors are often desensitized." Light merely nodded.

"Do you think Watari will be alright?"

"No Light, I do not think he will be anywhere near alright, not for a very long time."

"Of course, it was a stupid question." Light admitted. There was a long silence between them.

"Ryuzaki?"

"Yes?"

"I just wanted to see if tou were okay, you were really quiet."

"You would be quiet as well if you were trying to rest."

"Right. That's important."

"That's correct. I am sorry Light, I am just so tired and Watari and I will need to talk, I will need all the energy I can save."

"I understand. I'll sit here and stop talking."

"Thank you." L replied, he visibly shivered. Light stood up and wrapped the blanket around the detective."

"Again, I thank you."

"Just rest. You can thank me later." Several minutes passed before Watari returned to L's bedside. The old man seemed different, he approached L slowly.

"Ryuzaki, I-" L opened his eyes.

"It is alright Watari. You have done more for me than you can ever hope to realize." Watari reached out and gently stroked L's hair.

"Ryuzaki, I am so sorry."

"What did the lab say?" Light looked away, he couldn't watch the scene unfold.

"The illness has always been with him. It's genetic, usually skips generations, and lies dormant and virtually undetectable until the symptoms present themselves. There is no cure and the only treatment is to alleviate the symptoms for a time. The illness will sometimes go into a remission. It almost always returns. It has no set time limit and it has a ninety- nine percent fatality-" Watari found the words were getting caught in his throat.

"It will most often come back worse each time, taking the one who suffers from it closer to the inevitable each time. Once in a while there is a case in which the person can develope something like a barrier in the body and in of cases, it can eventually be defeated. Which accounts for the one percent."

"But Ryuzaki could be that one, he could be fine."

"I could, but it is highly unlikely."

"The most we can do is keep treating the symptoms and let him rest." Watari bowed his head.

"There it is Light." L sighed.

"What are you talking about?"

"Your waiting game."

"The toxins that are being released are winning at the moment, Ryuzaki you hate to lose right?"

"That is a fair statement, yes."

"So start fighting, we'll help as much as we can. We won't let you lose."


	6. Chapter 6

L looked over at Watari who was asleep in the chair next to him. He knew it hadn't been easy for the older man to deal with, even with all his training it couldn't have prepared him for the news he had recieved.

"Poor Watari, I wish there was a way to make this task easy for you. I find that despite everything we have been through, I-" L was interrupted by a sharp coughing fit. He moaned painfully at the aching in his chest and ribs.

"Ryuzaki, are you alright?" Light asked.

"You tell me." L snapped surprising Light.

"I apologize, it was a legitimate question and I should have-"

"It can't be easy for you, there's going to be some frustration, but as long as you get better, I'll deal with it okay?"

"No. It was not right for me to react in that way no matter what the situation may be. I do not like to complain, it is unproductive, however-"

"Go on." Light encouraged.

"I am so tired of being tired, and I am beyond the point of irritation, I cannot keep doing this, if it is recurring, I-" he looked back to Watari and found him still asleep, though he didn't seem to trusy what he saw and motioned for Light to come closer to him.

"What is it?" Light asked before L grabbed his shirt collar and pulled him closer to whisper in his ear.

"If you really are Kira, now would be the time to tell me. I would have considered it a personal favor if you would-"

"You can't be serious."

"I assure you, I am."

"Well, I'm not going to be able to help you there, but maybe you'll feel better now."

"I would say there is a zero percent chance of that happening." The conversation was cut short by the alarm on Watari's phone.

"Go sit down, quickly." L instructed attempting to calm himself.

"Ryuzaki?'

"Yes?" Light was amazed at how quickly the detective became himself again, L had to have been doing that for a while, it was almost like someone turning the light off and on.

"You really meant it didn't you, about-"

"Yes." Light didn't understand why he found L's request so unnerving.

Watari stirred sleepily before opening his eyes and turning off the alarm.

"Ryuzaki, feeling any better?" He asked standing up.

"No. It is most unfortunate." The look of disappointment in Watari's eyes was too much for L, he looked away.

"Ryuzaki, I want you to take these pills, they'll help you, are you in any pain today?" L didn't answer lately it seemed that he was always in pain, it was happening so often that L had begun training himself to hide it. Watari was suspicious of this and it frightened him to think it could be true.

"Ryuzaki," he placed a hand on L's head to get his attention. L glanced up at him.

"No." He said calmly.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes.I am feeling quite ill however" Watari help L sit up and take the medicine. Once L finished, he laid back down.

"Just rest now, it will get better soon."

"Yes Watari, soon. You should not worry about me so much."

"Worrying doesn't solve anything, you're right. But it isn't something that can be helped."

"I know." L replied shortly.

"I would like to check your temperature, if you'll let me." L nodded his approval.

Watari turned back to the try and grabbed the thermometer, and placed it under L's tongue.

"It only going to take a minute, just relax." L did as he was told. Finally the thermometer was removed and Watari shook his head.

"Still won't go down." He muttered.

Light felt bad for them both. The pair made him think of his father and himself, Watari was very obviously a father figure to L at the very least. It was clear now, L had always respected the man, but L's reaction to the expression from the old man was similar to a child who had just dishonored his father.

"I am sure it will respond to something Watari, we just have not found it yet." Light noticed the ill detective's breathing had now changed, L was now taking slower, more shallow breaths. He must have been in pain but Light didn't dare draw attention to the change, Watari didn't seem to notice it yet. The man was suffering enough, both were in Light's opinion.

"I have no choice." Watari stated. " I'll have to contact some associates and see what they can find, maybe there's something out there that can help. I'll contact Near in the morning, I believe he's our best chance."

"Watari-"

"Ryuzaki, I want you to listen to me carefully. I absolutely forbid you to leave this world before me, and I will do whatever I need to to ensure that doesn't happen."

"You are reaching for an is not-" light cleared his throat.

"Watari's right Ryuzaki, I'm sure there are answers somewhere, the sooner we we start looking, the better the chances." L shot him a look.

"On second thought, I think I'll contact him immediately, if he starts send information now, we may find something quickly. Ryuzaki, do you need anything while I'm out of the room?"

"No, Watari, thank you Light and I will be just fine. Take your time."

Watari excused himself from the room and L waited to make sure he was out of ear shot.

"You have done a terrible thing Light Yagami." He said sternly. "You have given Watari false hope, you and I know that there is no answer. I will die and Watari will-"

"You don't know that it's false and speaking of false Ryuzaki, why did you lie, you lied to him and you want to tell me about giving him-"

"Keep your voice down, he may hear you." The coughing had returned, bringing with it new waves of pain. L felt his chest and rib pain worsen and was unable to hide it. He almost couldn't stop himself from crying out in pain.

"Ryuzaki, do you want me to get Watari, he could give you something for pain." L shook his head.

"You can't protect him from this you know. Eventually you won't be able to hide it." Light softened his tone.

"I know, I have caused him too much pain lately. I do not want his pain to be as constant as mine."

"Then why are you giving in, why would you want Kira to-"

"I am tired Light, in more ways than one." Light didn't know exactly what L was telling him but the tone of his voice didn't sound good at all.


	7. Chapter 7

L rested his hands on his aching stomach as Watari added more medicine to the IV.

"It's going to ease your pain, and stop you from vomiting." The old man explained gently. "Light should be back with the heating pad in a few minutes. The heat will relax your stomach and soften the pain until the medication takes effect.

Watari sighed heavily.

"Hopefully Near can find something soon." L had made up his mind, he could no longer take this illness.

"Watari, I- the possibility of this getting better is not good, you and I know that, I think it is best if you-"

"Stop that. I can't hear you talk that way, how can you just accept this?" The older man was clearly upset by the conversation.

"Is this what you want for me?"

"Of course not, I would much rather you be out of this bed, well and happy. I don't want to watch you suffer. You know that." L shivered despite the layers of blankets.

"You're cold?" L nodded.

"Yes, and at times I am far too hot. Watari, you have always been good to me,you have always taken very good care of me and I understand this is difficult for you but as you once said to me, 'sometimes no matter how much you love someone or something and want to keep it, the very best thing you can do is let it go."

"Yes, I said that to you when you were small and your goldfish died, you are not a goldfish" L sighed.

"I loved fishy so." Watari sat down next to the bed, placing his hand on top of L's.

"I know you did, you used to sit there for hours watching it swim around the bowl, I recall that you were devastated the day you woke to find it was no longer in there." Watari said gently.

"I had hoped to get you a new fish before you noticed, though I knew you couldn't be tricked, I wanted to soften the loss for you."

"Thank you. It was a nice thought.

"How are you feeling now, has the medicine started to work?" L shook his head.

"the pain is still with me. I am terribly uncomfortable."

"I wish I could take all of this away from you."

"I would never want you to."

"I know, but I would anyway. I have lived my life, you should have the same opportunity."

"Thank you, for being with me Watari, if I did not have you to look after me, I would not have lived this long. You are a good man. One day you will-"

"Please don't do that, this is no time for that sort of conversation. It's a time for resting and trying not to think about that."

"I am not afraid."

"I know you're not, but I am. I have been with you since you were very little and have watched you grow into the amazing young man you are now. I simply couldn't be more proud of you." L smiled.

"Thank you Watari,means a lot to me to hear you say that."

"It's absolutely true. I have worked with many from the house, and you by far are the one I am most proud of. L ignored the stomach pains as he felt pride in himself for the first time since he was a child.

Light stood in the doorway, a genuine smile crept onto his face as he looked at the pair. The pieces of the puzzle were falling into place. It had been in front of him the entire time, Watari didn't see L as a job,L was a son to the older man. Had Light truly wanted to destroy the detective, Watari would be the key. He made his way over to them.

"Ryuzaki, how are you feeling?"

"If you have to ask-"

"Okay, I understand, stupid question right?"

"Yes, I would agree with that statement." Light handed the heating pad to watari who plugged it in and waited for it to warm up before carefully placing it on L's stomach. Within minutes, L relaxed into his pillow.

"Thank you Light." L said calmly.

"No problem, I'm happy to help. Is there anything else you need?"

"If It's not too much trouble, would you mind getting more water?" L asked.

"Of course, I won't be gone long ." Light grabbed the pitcher from the tray and exited the room once more. He would have some thinking to do.


	8. Chapter 8

"At least we can be grateful for this small break." Watari said, L had been showing little improvements over the last three days, and with Near searching for any sign of an undiscovered or perhaps simply lesser known treatment, Watari was hopeful that one might be found.

"Yes, it is nice to feel better, I had almost forgotten what it was like." L said sitting up in bed.

"Hopefully you'll stay this way for a while, maybe Near will give us good news on his next report." Light said sitting in the chair next to him.

"That is very unlikely, if this is part of-"

"That's enough, let's just enjoy your health while we can." Watari suggested. The tone Watari used was calm and seemed to give L a sense of peace.

"You are right Watari, we don't really know how long it will last, it would be a good idea to put the day to good use. Perhaps-"

"No. Today is a good day to rest more comfortably. I can't tell you enough how important it is for you to rest. If this is just part of the illness, you can worsen your condition, put the case out of your mind for now. I can't let you do that."

"We cannot waste anymore time. The situation will be handled. Trust me."

"I have always trusted you Watari. " the old man smiled.

"It'll all work out for the best, I strongly believe that. It gives me hope to see you this way."

"I would like to apologize to you both for the last several weeks, I have not been myself and I know that I have not been easy to get along with at times. I will try to do better in the future."

"Ryuzaki, you don't need to be sorry, you can only take so much at once, everyone has their limit. I can't really blame you." Light said. "Honestly, I couldn't have handled it as well as you are if I was in your position."

"I'm just sorry I can't fix this for you. I feel that I should be telling you I'm sorry. For all you've been through. If you become irritated here and there, you're entitled to it."

"No, I have no right to complain. There are most likely others who suffer far more that-"

"Since the day you and I met Ryuzaki, I have only heard you mention your suffering twice. All things considered, I would say you have earned that right, it may help you to get out some of that frustration."

"You are both very understanding, I could not ask for better care givers, thank you."

"Thank us by getting better." Light said.

"I feel that I must do something, I cannot simply lie here when I feel so much better."

"Maybe you need to find a hobby, do you like reading, that's a good activity for resting."

"What exactly am I supposed to read, did you happen to bring a book here with you?" L asked skeptically.

"No, but-"

"Watari and I do not carry books wherever we go. Before taking part in a hobby of any kind, it would be a good idea to have the necessary material for it. Wouldn't you agree Light?"

"Anyway, I would rather use this time wisely. I could be contacting the-"

"Stop. Let's take it slow for a while." Watari said.

"I do not like being useless."

"You're not Ryuzaki. I know it seems that way, but think about how much better you'll be, you could enjoy your accomplishment when you do catch Kira." Light said encouragingly.

"Light, I get no enjoyment from catching people. I do it because it needs to be done."

"I'm sorry Ryuzaki, have you ever done anything else with your spare time?"

"I have never had spare time." Light looked at him in amazement.

"Never?"

"No."

"So you go from one case straight to another?"

"Yes."

"How can you do that?"

"I am used to it." Watari sighed, it was true, L had never taken time for himself. No sooner had the detective closed one case, another file was dropped in front of him.

"It's my fault. I'm the one that gives him the cases."

"No Watari, if there would not be anyone commiting crimes, I would not need to do such things. Kira was right that a world without crime would be better, however the method he uses is not the answer to the problem."

"When you get better, I'm putting you first. You're going to take some down time. No more cases for a while, we can do whatever it is that you want." Watari promised.

"I do not know what that would be."

"Then take the time to learn." Light didn't know what to think about what had been said. Part of him felt bad for L, had he not been the enemy, Light would have offered to help him find something, perhaps invited him to spend a day with him and explore the possibilities.

"I do like chess once in a while." L said.

"We don't have a chess set either though."

"We could get one. I would need to contact someone to buy one but that can be arranged.

"I can call my father, he passes by a few stores on his way home." Light said.

"If you do that, would you mind asking for him to get some strawberries as well?" Light and Watari smiled.

"You're hungry?"

"Yes."

"That's good, maybe you are getting better." Watari said.

"Or it-" l thought about his response. Watari was happy for the first time in weeks.

"It is a possibility that that could be the case." He had disappointed the old man enough.

By late afternoon, L found himself with a bowl of strawberries and playing chess with both Light and Watari in turn.

"You're really good at this Ryuzaki." Light commented after being defeated for the third time in a row.

"You did very well Light, if you had looked at the board carefully, you could have won that time."

"That's true, I can't believe I missed such an obvious move."

"Neither can I."

"What are you suggesting Ryuzaki?"

"Nothing. Should I be?"

"You're trying to trick me into giving something away. It won't work."

"It already has, only a guilty person would have taken my comment and thought more of it. A comment that was genuine and meant nothing more than what was said, I was simply pointing out that if you had moved the knight instead, it would have trapped my piece and allowed you to take gave the information voluntarily." Light shook his head.

"That's amazing. I can't argue with that."

"No. It was your own confession after all."

"It's good to have you back." Light said honestly.

"You say that now, but if I do recover, you will still be a suspect." L warned.

"Yeah, I know. Guilty until proven innocent."

"I suppose you could look at it that way."

"Isn't it supposed to be the other way around?"

"In certain places and circumstances yes."

The laptop lit up and Watari took it from the room to answer the call.

"Maybe It's good news."

"You should know by now, it will not be good news, at least not for me. Kira on the other hand will most likely find it favorable." L said biting into a strawberry.

"I'm glad to see you eating something."

"I will admit that I did miss these."

Before Light could reply, Watari returned, his expression was one of disappointment.

"It's alright Watari, we'll figure something out." Light said.

Watari didn't reply. L couldn't stand to see the man so upset.

"Watari."

"Yes?"

"I have almost finished eating all of the strawberries you have given me." This seemed to cheer the old man up. He looked at the bowl and saw only two remaining.

"That's wonderful, do you think you can finish them?' L smiled.

"Yes." Watari watched the detective empty the bowl.

"I'm very proud of you. You did very well today. I only hope that tomorrow will bring more improvement."


	9. Chapter 9

"You're trying I'll give you that, you had a few really good days,try to imagine how Watari feels right now. He's just in the hall, Near didn't have any news for us today. There's going to be some soon, there has to be. You know Ryuzaki, sometimes the person decides if they live, keep in mind that It's not just you, Watari needs you. I figured it out, Watari's like a father to you isn't he?" Light sighed

"If he is, I can't imagine what he's going through right now. I know if it was my father watching me go through this, he'd be devastated. Don't lose this, for Watari. You would do anything for him wouldn't you, now you have a chance to prove it. Watari would die for you, so don't you think It's fair to live for him?" With each day that passed, L became weaker, he slept nearly constantly now. Light liked to think that it was because he was attempting to save his strength and that he would soon be well again.

Light couldn't help but genuinely worry about L, he had witnessed far too much of their pain to not feel some of his own. He was conflicted now about what needed to be done.

"No change?" Watari asked moving close to the bed.

"No."

"That's good in a way, it means he's not getting worse."Watari said turning to watch the monitor.

"Yeah, but he's not getting better either." The older man pressed a hand to L's forehead.

L's eyes opened. "Watari, I am sorry." L's voice was barely above a whisper.

"For what Ryuzaki, you haven't done anything."

"Not yet, I may not get to tell you later."

"Of course you will. You're going to be fine."

"You should not put such faith in a false hope. It only leads to disappointment."

"Ryuzaki, you have never disappointed me."

"There is a first time for everything Watari." L couldn't look into the man's eyes as he spoke.

"I know it feels like It's never going to end, it will and when it does, you will be better. I am going to ask that you keep going as long as you can, if not for yourself for me."

"You ask so little of me, however, this is something that I may not be able to do. I am- I am tired Watari." Light hadn't understood when L said the same thing to him, but Watari seemed to and from his expression, it all became clear.

"You shouldn't say such things. You must not give in to this."

"I have tried, it is not going to go away even if it feels better at times, it comes back much worse."

"Give yourself time. You could build up a defense to it, I know It's a rare occurrence but we have to stay hopeful. Just rest, you will need the strength you have."

"I have very little, I feel it being drained from me."

"It's going to be okay Ryuzaki, we'll figure it out." Light said.

"Someday perhaps." L coughed harshly.

"Soon. I also want to retest you for a few things, just as a precaution. We might need to add some medicine to what you're getting."

"No." L said.

"No?"

"I will not allow anything more to be added. No."

"If it's medically necessary-"

"No more." L said sternly. Watari looked as if he didn't know what to do next.

"You're old enough to make your own choices now, I can't force you to do anything you don't want to do. I can only hope that you know how important you are to me and that would be mean something to you. Will you allow the tests at the very least?"

"I see no point, however I will allow it." L closed his eyes. He didn't like to see Watari hurting so much but he didn't want to continue to deal with this illness, it was becoming too much. He had always thought of Watari first, maybe now it was his turn to be selfish and do what was best for himself.

Watari sighed and walked back into the hallway.

"Why would you do that Ryuzaki, after all Watari-"

"Everything I have done with my life was for Watari, It is time I did something for myself."

"But this isn't-'

"Stop, enough is enough. I will not listen to anymore about it. I must sleep, but I will not tolerate-"

"Just think about it."

"I have and my decision has been made." Light sighed in frustration, but didn't reply.

After a few minutes, Watari's laptop screen lit up and Light recognized it as a call from Near. He picked up the computer and took it to the older man.

"Thank you light." Watari said as the Light returned to his chair.

"Near, what have you found?"

"At this point in my research, this is all I can give to you, howver I will keep looking."

"Excellent, I appreciate your effort."

"I am sending you the information now, I can't promise it will work, there have been very few cases that used this treatment, the best outcome was not cured but the patient's life was extended by three years."

"It's a start. The message just arrived thank you."

"Watari?"

"Yes Near?"

"Best of luck to you both."


	10. Chapter 10

"Must we go through this?" L asked sleepily.

"You promised me you would, so yes." Watari answered as he the procedure began.

"I suppose I did, it was not as if you would let me say no. Between the two of you, I have never witnessed such-"

"Just lie still, you will need to rest, this procedure will take four or so hours, if you feel differently, let me know immediately." L turned his attention to the small tube that was slowly removing his blood. Watari had explained that cleaning his blood, though it was a long shot, was something he wanted to try. His hope was that at the end of the procedure, L would have better test results, Watari had taken to testing him frequently.

"May I sleep then?" L asked impatiently.

"If you like. " L closed his eyes but found it difficult to sleep.

"Watari, can we stop this?"

"Why, what is it?"

"I am feeling as if I am going to be ill, my stomach is starting to hurt and my head is-"

"Alright, I can't stop, but I can adjust it." Light shook his head, something would have to work.

"Are you sure about this Watari?" Light asked.

"No, Watari is reaching for a solution that does not exist." L answered.

"Don't say that, just because you're giving up doesn't mean I have to let you." The old man said sternly.

"Did you not say I was able to choose for myself?"

"I did, then I decided to revoke that decision."

"On what grounds?" L asked weakly.

"Temporary insanity." L was clearly upset by the comment.

"That is not true and you know it, just because I do not agree-"

"It's find to disagree Ryuzaki, but you refused medication." Watari explained.

"I knew exactly what I was saying, you know I did. Unless you have a legal document to prove your "

"I would suggest that you don't provoke me into getting one, you know I can." Watari warned. Light could hardly believe what he was witnessing, L and Watari were...arguing.

"You should think very carefully about what you say to me Watari, I do not want you to regret it after I-"

"You're not going to, I won't allow it."

"You have no way to stop it, it happens to everyone eventually. Medical treatment is just a way to delay the inevitable. When it is time, there is nothing that can be done. I am sorry that it worries you but it is a fact that we all have to accept." Watari lowered himself into his chair.

"If you know how hard it is for me, why must you continue, how much pain will you inflict on an old man's heart?" L sighed it was clear that he was ashamed of himself. Light was amazed by the confrontation though he himself was not proud of himself, he couldn't help but wonder, both Watari and L were very intelligent people, light found himself wondering who would win the argument and looked forward to finding the answer. What he didn't expect was for L to give in. He watched the old man who it seemed was pained by his own words. He reached out to the detective only for him to pull away.

"I am...sorry, it seems I have been hurting you almost constantly Watari. You do not deserve this treatment, you have always been good to me and I am deeply ashamed by my inexcusable behavior, I will not as your forgiveness, I am not worthy of it."

"Ryuzaki, if I made you feel this terrible, I'm s-"

"No, you do not need to be sorry, you are doing what you believe is best for me. Please understand that I appreciate your effort, my illness however is difficult for me, it causes constant pain and I am struggling with it. I know that you are as well, I am being selfish and there is no excuse for it. I do not want you to feel guilty when I can no long stay with you."

"Ryuzaki, I've never heard those things from you. I suppose I never realized the extent of your suffering, I have been blinded by my own pain and fear." He reach out once more to stroke L's hair lovingly.

"Please Watari, do not do that, I do not deserve such kindness." Watari sighed and began to do it anyway.

"You most certainly do.I can't begin to imagine how hard this must be for you. The fact is, since the day you came to me, you have been nothing less than a son to me and I have always wanted to protect you.I-"

"You cannot protect me from everything, you cannot control this illness, please don't be so upset Watari, it hurts me." L said staring into the old man's eyes. Light could feel tears in his own eyes and excused himself from the room.

"Since you're going to be out there, get some supplies for another blood test, I'll be check that later. Could you also bring the heating pad back on?" Light nodded, he didn't trust his voice. He began his journey to the supply closet passing by empty rooms feeling a sense of dread in his heart.

"I must be losing my mind." He whisper to himself. " L'sickness shouldn't be making me feel like this. This is crazy.' A few tears fell as he entered the supply closet and grabbed the requested items. He began his walk back but instead of going right to L's room, light decided to calm himself in the room beside it. He laid down on the bed and took in a deep breath. He soon realized that he could faintly hear Watari and L through the vent beside the bed. He listened carefully, maybe they were just doing this to try to make him confess to being Kira, he had to admit it was a pretty elaborate plan, but L was the best detective in the world so light couldn't dismiss the idea just yet.

"Watari, I feel so...weak" L moaned softly.

"It's going to be alright. Just rest, things will get better, we'll get through this."

"I do not want to go through this again, I cannot do it, please Watari, just something to make me comfortable, I do not want to feel this way anymore."

"L, I-I don't want you to hurt either, but I-"

"If you love me Watari, please." The feeble voice pleaded. There was a long silence followed.

"I do love you, that's why I'm trying so hard to make you better, but if you're really that bad, I will make you as comfortable as possible. Are you sure I can't talk you out of this?"

"I am certain yes."

"Very well L, just know that I love you.

"You are a good man Watari, I believe I will still have some time to spend with you, in return for all you have done for me, I will try to make it as pleasant as possible." Light couldn't believe it, after all they had gone through, the legendary L was giving up. More tears flowed as he thought of Watari, how devastated he would be, light himself felt bad for L, even with his plan, Light didn't want L to die, not like this.


End file.
